A New Year's Resolution (Wrapped)
"In 2023, I would listen to more new music."
Below is a guest essay written by my best friend Matt Gibson. Something I’ve admired about Matt since we first met over a decade ago (wow) is his ambition. He pursues his interests with an unusual intensity. If you’re interested in more of Matt’s work, here is his photo essay from Scotland, and here is an interview with him, both previously published in LR. Thank you, Matt, for sharing your writing here today, and for inspiring me to be creative every day.
The days between Christmas Day and New Year’s Eve will always be some of my favorite days of the year. Days become seemingly irrelevant, the general rules of society seem to stop just for a brief period. You want a glass of warm wine at 3 in the afternoon? Go for it!
During this time last year, I found myself sitting on the couch scrolling my phone in the middle of the day when I came across a TikTok from Rolling Stone Magazine: Best Albums of 2022.
The list began counting down from ten to one. I had listened to two of them; Midnights (Taylor Swift) and Harry’s House (Harry Styles).
Well done Matt, you have listened to the two most famous musicians in the world.
According to Rolling Stone, the number one album of the year was Renaissance by Beyonce. And I hadn’t listened to it.
If you have spent any time on TikTok, you’ll know that the real content is in the comments section. They operate in a similar manner to Reddit threads, with the best comments getting more votes and therefore moving to the top.
One top comment on the Rolling Stone video stuck with me, Ethel Cain not being on this list is a crime.
I hadn’t even heard of Ethel Cain.
–
I love music, I played piano growing up (admittedly, absolutely awfully) and anyone who has spent any modicum of time with me knows that I will always have something playing in the background.
My commute in the morning is seven minutes, that’s time for two songs in my mind (or one listening of Everywhere by Paolo Nutini).
Music is a way for me to measure time. I brush my teeth for one song.
My wife will sometimes say “Can we sit in quiet?”
To which I will always reply, “Why?”
–
I have never been a massive fan of New Year’s Resolutions.
That is to say, I like making them (who doesn’t want to be a slightly better version of themselves?) but like most people, I tend to just give up a month or so into the new year. On the couch at my in-laws’ house, I made my 2023 New Year’s Resolution.
In 2023, I would listen to more new music.
I started small. I made a note in my phone and began a list with the eight albums from the Rolling Stone’s top ten. The ninth album I added was Ethel Cain - Preacher’s Daughter.
–
I sit in my office with a group of other photographers who are using the space to edit photos during a golf tournament. The office soundtrack today is a chorus of polite small talk.
We talk about movies. I declare Whiplash a top-20 movie of all-time.
“You love to rank stuff, don’t you Matt?”
He says it in an accusatory manner, but he isn’t wrong. I do love to rank stuff.
–
In part, this resolution was born from the fact that I often found myself listening to the same songs or artists.
Cooking dinner: (What’s the Story) Morning Glory?
On an airplane: Norman Fucking Rockwell
1hr+ drive in the car: Speak Now (Taylor’s Version)
_
The drive from Winston-Salem to Pinehurst is an hour. On that crisp morning in December, as we began our drive, I put on my first album of this journey.
Low bass tones start.
A man’s voice starts mumbling.
The bass continues.
The male voice goes on.
These crosses all over my body, sings the woman, remind me of who I used to be.
We listened to Preacher’s Daughter by Ethel Cain.
The fact that that album was not on the Rolling Stone list was, in fact, a crime. After we pull into our driveway, I grab my phone and add a line of text in my Notes app beside the album’s title.
Ethel Cain: Preacher’s Daughter - Fantastic, feels more like a work of art than an album.
After listening to that album, my overriding feeling was not joy, but anger. I felt angry. I could not believe that album had been out for five months and I lived without these songs. These tracks were out in the world and I was living blissfully unaware.
In between unpacking the car, I texted everyone I knew: You have to listen to this.
We walked into the house and I put on Thoroughfare by Ethel Cain, my favorite song on the album. When the song was finished, I listened to it again.
–
I had never started this resolution/project/adventure with the intention of ranking the albums. But as the project went on, I realized that I desired a way to track what I had liked or disliked.
I tell my friend what I am doing. He asks me, “What defines new?”
It just has to be new to me. New to my ears. I tell him to send me a list of any album, from any generation that he thinks I should listen to. Three days later, he sends me a list of over one hundred albums.
–
By February, I was on pace for one new album a day. Then I ran into an issue.
Sitting at my desk, I opened Lightroom and put on A House in Nebraska by Ethel Cain. I was going back to albums/songs - and it was against the spirit of what I was trying to do.
To discover new music, not go back.
But I still call home that house in Nebraska
Where we found each other on a dirty mattress on the second floor
(Where I needed you, and I need you still)
Where the world was empty, save you and I
Where you came and I laughed, and you left and I cried
Where you told me even if we died tonight, that I'd die yours
(So I died there under you every night, all night)
_
Naturally, I find it difficult to keep on top of the resolution. December 2023 rolls around. It brings Christmas decorations. It brings Klaus. It brings Spotify Wrapped.
Burlington.
Hypnotist.
74,134 minutes.
Taylor Swift (finally) loses top spot and moves down to third.
Ethel Cain is fourth.
–
At time of writing (December 5, 2023), I have listened to just over new 190 albums.
I had wanted to do 300, but with a final push, I will hit 200.
I am proud.
The rate at which I listen to new albums has slowed. As I discover more great music, I go back and listen again. And again. And again.
I guess that’s sort of the point.
Send me your favorite albums. I promise I’ll listen to them.
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